I have been stuck in an emotional rut for the past 48 hours, and it’s been hard to move out of it. It’s not often that I get disconnected. Through the years of working in therapy I have really learned how to stay connected, even in the hardest of struggles. But then there are times when I get caught in an emotional rut and disconnection finds its way through me. The past 48 hours have been one of those times, and it’s frustrating not being able to pull out of it. It began with an anxiety attack I had in…
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This weekend so far has been a toss between good and hard, sad and happy, empowered and maybe feeling a little weak, but I try to remind myself “I am not there yet, but I am so close“. Being stuck in place and waiting for “the switch” to happen inside is not always the easiest thing. I know what I want to feel, I know what I want to do, I know where I am going – but it’s not here yet. It can be so frustrating at times. In all the years I have been working on my healing…
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Nothing is more comforting than just “resting in the knowing”. I was reminded of this today “rest in the knowing” – “find a soft place to land” “rest in what is true and real” “connection is all around you”. Today was a comforting day for many reasons. When I can rest in the knowing and feel completely connected – I heal. When I am walking on my path towards me, and I am allowing myself to be surrounded by those who love, care and support me and where I am – I heal. It’s no surprise that I have had…
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Tonight I am sitting here and things are becoming clearer. I feel more connected tonight than I have in weeks. I always have believed that “connection” is what serves a great path to my healing. Today I was reminded of that connection. I was reminded that nothing has changed in this hard place I was in. Nothing has changed in the support, care or love – it’s there, I just need to accept it and have trust in it. Sometimes I need to be reminded when I get lost in the hardness. I have realized over the years in therapy…
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Today was about accomplishment and celebration in my healing. Today was one of my favorite days in this journey I have been on; regardless of still feeling sad and weak. For years in my healing, when I have gone through something hard to the point of feeling really weak and I don’t want to admit it – I tend to run off, hide and lick my own wounds. Sometimes, I care so much about my damn independence that I won’t let people help when I feel REALLY weak. I have gone into disconnection because of it in the past, and that sometimes…