five minute friday – identity

Five minute Friday we bloggers write for five minutes flat on Fridays.

We set a timer, throw caution to the winds and try to remember what it was like to just write without worrying if it’s just right or not.

write for 5 minutes, no back-drafting, no editing – today’s word is: identity

Start:  When I saw this word in the five minute Friday, I felt goosebumps. I felt goosebumps because this is the reason why I write. This is the reason why I show up in therapy 4 days a week.

Being a victim of child abuse you don’t really know who you are until you seek to find what is underneath.

I spent my whole life being what I needed to be, instead of being who God intended me to be. I had to be what they wanted me to be to make it through each day.

I have spent the past 5 years finding out who Karen is “underneath it all”, each part of my healing is uncovering that. I even wrote about this in a blog writing a couple of weeks ago called {Who I am Underneath it all}

I have finally found out who I am, what I want to do, where I want to be, and who the true me is behind the walls that were built since I was 5 years old.

I think one of the most powerful parts of my healing is uncovering what I was to see who I am. I am finding that I am a person, I am a child of God, I am loved, I am supported.

I am reminded by my support that I am a wonderful person, caring and loving, gentle and kind, soft spoken and compassionate” and I am learning to see all those things that were underneath the abuse – slowly I am seeing it. It’s still hard for me to believe it, but I know it’s there.

I think a person’s identity is created by God.. he wants us to be how he see’s us, and better yet, he wants us to BELIEVE what he has created in us – we just need to find it, and embrace it.

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