a little free time
I have cleared my schedule and I am ready for some much-needed down time this week, and I plan to enjoy it to the fullest – I so need it right now.
My therapist is only taking off one week this summer and this is the week he is gone, and so I decided because I am in therapy many days a week; I would also plan my “down time” as well around his schedule.
My youngest is out of school, my middle son is done his online schooling, and my husband is on a business trip this coming week, so it only makes sense to just clear my schedule and enjoy some much-needed relaxing time at home.
Normally I go to the beach many times during the summer (which we are doing in July for a week), but this week, I just want some time to putt around the house and just BE!
When I first began therapy I remember how disconnected I would be when my therapist took a week off in the summer or over break. I would always think he would forget our work, or he wouldn’t return, or mad that he got to go away and get refreshed while I stayed in the mundane healing process.. today is different, now I pretty much want to pack his bags myself (we laughed about that this week).
I enjoy down time, and the more and more I heal and trust that down time for me is okay, I look forward to it.
My therapist talked to me Friday about staying leaned in and connected and how email and text would be good this week, but I also like the space. I need to disconnect a little so I can re-connect with myself, my support and the process.
SO…. what will I do with some of my downtime? Seeing I am not going to the ocean until July – next month, I will stay around home . I will write in my blog, read, sit by the pool with a good book and get my summer tan going. I will decorate my house the way I wanted to. I will cook on the grill with my boys, even have a picnic…. the beauty of it is, there is NO SCHEDULE.
Accepting time for myself wasn’t always easy for me. This is something (believe it or not) that therapy taught me much about. My therapist has really showed me how to care for myself, how to fulfill my own needs without always working so hard. I have learned that I am worth taking some down time for myself and don’t always have to be on guard to all the things around me.
Things have changed so much in the past couple of years, and I only imagine things will change so much going forward for the better.
My therapist and I are working on something pretty big in therapy right now, so I truly believe this week break is just what I need to jump into this. We all need some time off, and I only wish I knew and accepted this a long time ago.
One of my favorite things to do is writing by the pool, and so that will be on my agenda this week. The weather calls to be beautiful!
What does “down time” mean for you? what do you do when you need some time away from the every day struggles and schedules of your life?
I look forward to connecting to my blog this week…. I look forward to connecting with myself as well!
June 2, 2013 at 5:46 PM
I can’t believe you and your therapist email and text. that would be awesome if I could do that, and I know boundaries so it would not be ‘too often’… just a convenient way to keep in touch. Mine would not do that.
June 2, 2013 at 5:51 PM
I dont know, I guess every therapist is different, but we have been connecting like that since 6 years ago …. I just have VERY strong boundaries and VERY strong respect FOR HIS boundaries and he knows that about me, and I think that is why he likes to connect with me and trusts it.
It’s nice to have that connection, but at the same time during a week vacation I also like the break too …
We text small stuff back and forth.. like he will send me a text saying “Hey karen, just leaning in to remind you that connection is good, I carry you with me and know that we have a good connection”
I will text back something simple like “hey, just connecting, hope your having a good day”
We email every Sunday night with our thoughts on the week of therapy .. it’s nice to talk about what the work felt like and what the work looks like going forward..
we call it “LEANING IN” .. lol ..
it took him a LONG LONG time to get me to accept this connection. I am NOT ONE that likes to depend on it, or take it for granted and he knows that about me, so to him it’s not something that is WORK.. that is what he tells me …. lol
I think it’s good.. but sometimes I also need the break ..
June 2, 2013 at 5:57 PM
that is so GOOD! GOOD for you for taking time out and taking time to REALLY see the time for you is worth the time needed.
Andy cares, that is why he wants to stay connected. I imagine for him as your therapist and how often you two work together he feels a connection with you and just because you are on a week break, maybe he feels he wants that connection with you as well. Remember this is not just about you connected to the therapy work, HE is connected to you as well. You are a person too you know, so of course he would like to stay connected, and you deserve it.
I hope you find some good moments this week for you, and I can’t wait to read about it.
June 3, 2013 at 8:22 AM
Being able to accept down time, time for yourself is an important part of healing work. I think a significant part of healing happens when we relax, it happens beyond our conscious ‘control’ or will. So it sounds super good what you are doing.
Being by water also sounds soothing and relaxing. I’d love to go to an ocean beach….maybe we will do that this summer too.
Down time for means low stress. Could be a lot of different activities. Maybe one of the biggest things is to have very little scheduled and being open to doing what occurs in the moment to moment. Really tuning in and listening to what my body, soul and heart want to do, beyond the duties of daily life.
The last few years my husband and I have been having Stay-at-home vacations. We’ll take a whole week and “unplug” from our usual routines and do what ever we want. We make a brainstorm list of fun activities that we both want to do and do some of them. But let it be open, to rigidly scheduled in. We’ll treat ourselves with favorite foods we don’t eat ever day. And go to places in nature that we love.
Taking vacations away from home is mixed because it does give you time away from your usual routines but there is a lot of work involved in planning, packing and traveling etc. Not to put down vacations away….sometimes they are the best. But they do require extra work.
Stay at home vacations have a challenging aspect too. When you are at home it’s harder to not answer the phone, or fall into feeling like you should use the time to catch up on some work you’ve been procrastinating on….You have to be firm in what you really want to do and UNPLUG.
Have a great time off Karen.
June 3, 2013 at 11:21 AM
Thank you Gel …. it’s off to a great start!! tomorrow I start with the pool …. and I plan to write in my blog almost every day because I ENJOY THAT … writing is such an outlet for me … I LOVE it.. maybe I will make an effort to write about “different” things in my blog other than healing.. we shall see
your time off sounds wonderful … I love the idea of “staycations” hehehe
thank you for your thoughts Gel