Tonight I am sitting here and things are becoming clearer. I feel more connected tonight than I have in weeks. I always have believed that “connection” is what serves a great path to my healing. Today I was reminded of that connection. I was reminded that nothing has changed in this hard place I was in. Nothing has changed in the support, care or love – it’s there, I just need to accept it and have trust in it. Sometimes I need to be reminded when I get lost in the hardness. I have realized over the years in therapy…
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Five minute Friday we bloggers write for five minutes flat on Fridays. We set a timer, throw caution to the winds and try to remember what it was like to just write without worrying if it’s just right or not. write for 5 minutes, no back-drafting, no editing – today’s word is: Goodbye Start: When I saw the word “goodbye” the first thing I thought about was how tough it was to let go of the 5 year old child that resided inside of me. The 5 year old child that I held onto – her story, her pain, her truth,…
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Since being in therapy, I truly believe that emotional healing plays a huge factor in physical healing. I also believe and have learned that emotional stress also leads to physical stress – they go both hand in hand. I was born with a heart condition called “Bicuspid Aortic Valve”. I didn’t know I was born with this condition until I was rushed to the hospital in AFIB (Atrial Fibrillation) back in 2004, which I have to say was the scariest moment of my life, and a turning point in my physical healing as well. When I was a child I always…
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Today I experienced a road block in my writing, until now. This happens when I cannot reach anything inside, but I know there are things sitting there; waiting to be reached. I sometimes experience this in therapy as well. I will go into session and I am silent. I just have nothing to open up inside; even though there is a lot inside. Today when thinking about what I wanted to write, I was reminded about “the tree’s that bend”, and the photo that I look at everyday in my healing. This photograph of the trees is actually a canvas that…
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Tonight I am writing this blog and giving thanks to my therapist Andy who has truly given me the vision and encouragement to write about something that is so hard to write. I was reminded that “The truth will set you free” no matter how hard or how bad it feels inside. This entry is actually one of the hardest, and I am thankful that I was given the strength to help write it. I have started this entry, I have deleted it, started over, I have edited, and I have stopped and I have cried. I have shut the computer, I…
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When I first started this blog last year, it began in little thoughts. I started off using the “photo” to tell the story of what I was writing, and then slowly it became writing the story, and finding a photo to help tell the story. As I continued to write and be inspired by a couple of people, I noticed more and more that my voice was being heard, and my stories were longer and more authentic to how I was feeling inside. In the past 2 months I have noticed that my voice is getting stronger and stronger. My…
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This Sunday morning, I am doing something different by posting a 2nd blog today! This 2nd blog is a song, a beautiful song of “grace and mercy”. I am going to post another song by “Anna Kay Toms”. This is another song that means alot to me that she sang quite often. When I hear this song, it reminds me of “healing from something so deep”. This song is about walking through trials of life, and washing away the feelings of shame from your life that you hold. It’s absolutley beautiful and healing. This song is short, but if you…
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I woke up this morning and felt like I could breathe a little easier. I felt a sense of goodness like I am in the right place, and that what happened yesterday in “being with my emotions” was what needed to happen. I always talk to my therapist about “waiting for the day to be done this journey in healing”. Waiting for the day that I come in maybe once a month to check in, or waiting for the day that I am on my own path knowing that I am fully healed and I am fully ”restored”. There have…