It has been quite a long time since I have written a blog – and what better time to bring back my writing and my blog while celebrating 12 amazing years thus far being on this healing journey in therapy. Much like the new look and feel of my blog – my healing journey in therapy has also grown in ways I never thought I could grow, and I have an amazing therapist to thank for walking along side of me, and supporting me in each vulnerable step I have taken. The photo above is the room I have spent…
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Continue Reading . . . .When I saw this months cover of Time Magazine’s “Person of the year” – The Silence Breakers – The Voices That Launched a Movement” it not only struck an angry nerve for me, but it made me sad and frustrated! For YEARS people have been speaking out about sexual assault, sexual abuse, child sexual abuse, rape and so on! I am not talking about just celebrities; I am talking about your everyday mom, wife, daughter, sister, father, husband, son, and brother. People have been speaking out more and more about sexual assault, sexual abuse, and even rape! I believe it…
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Continue Reading . . . .“I stopped looking for the light and decided to become the light instead.” This quote is so true to what I feel is going on inside this past month. Even as I sit here and write this blog, it feels different – there is a newness of this writing and the process of being open with where I am. Like I shared with my therapist in session last week, “this past month has been the most healing in all the years of being in therapy.” I look forward to what this new light will bring to me as I continue…
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The past couple of weeks I have been experiencing very strong, vivid dreams and memories of my past when I was a little child, and it’s been incredibly hard to sit with these memories that have come to me in my sleep. I have written before about “crying wake up’s” that I experience once in a while – dreaming and then waking up crying out of my sleep. Well, its happening again only now it’s happening along with very vivid and strong memories of my past. The moment I wake up with a dream like this, I try and grab…
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Continue Reading . . . .As a part of my Tuesday at Ten prompt “Who do you admire/who inspires you” it was so easy as to who I would write about as “this someone” has had such an impact on my life for the past 10 years. This person who I admire and who inspires me is my therapist Andy; someone who has taught me so much, and has helped me to see the things I could never see before I took the steps to healing. Andy is such a wonderful person who has so much to teach and give others; someone who uses that…
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When I began therapy almost 10 years ago, I was scared! I was vulnerable, I was unsure of what the process would be. I was afraid to let someone else into the part of my life I had locked up deep within for a very long time. But I took that step 10 years ago, and I took that step because it was something I needed to do for me – for that scared locked up little girl inside that never had a voice to speak without consequences. I was told by “other people of my past” that going to…
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“Your wounded inner child will never be healed by something from the outside but only by yourself, your own power and wisdom” I have struggled for many years to even accept that I had an inner child. I struggled with the thought that the little girl I was still remains struck inside of me – wanting to be healed, loved and connected to. I feared that if I accepted that part of me, that it would mean I was mentally ill, or I would be more damaged than I thought I would. I was afraid that I would be looked…
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As I sit here writing, putting words to this blog, it feels weird as I haven’t written in so long – – but at the same time it feels familiar. I took a backseat to my writing and many other things this past year, but the one thing I didn’t take a backseat to was my healing, and continuing to fight and put one foot in front of the other. For the past year or so, I went through emotional and physical isolation, I pushed away my writing, I pushed away people who I was once close to, I pushed…
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Sometimes, when we are struggling, or going through a hard time, we long to move out of whatever we are going through to get back to how things were – “if only I can feel better”, “I wish I could go back to how I felt then when things felt easier“, “if only I could go back to that moment when . . . . “. Sound familiar? I know we have all been there. We have all wished to take back a moment or a time, or to wish that we could go back to a particular good feeling,…