One of the things that my therapist and I have worked so hard on the past couple of months is using my voice as a way to talk about things so that they are no longer in darkness – rather in the light to heal.
Yes that’s what therapy is about, but I feel I have been talking about things on a much deeper level in therapy.
My therapist has said to me lately “you are talking about things like I have never heard you talking about them before” and I really do get what he means by that, because I have never felt healing happening as I have before.
There is a difference between “talking about something”vs “talking about something being fully connected to self, to my therapist and fully connected to the room and the space around me.
I remember years ago, just talking about something hard would numb me so much that it took days or weeks to talk about something hard! today is so different, I feel it, I talk about it in that moment … not letting the darkness keep it from the light – rather giving it light from darkness.
This feels like a different kind of healing! Learning to trust the process and realizing that when we shed light on darkness, its less suffering in the dark the quicker you shed light on it.
I have really learned from my work with my therapist that, I am NOT alone, I don;t have to be alone in it, and the sooner I shed light on how I feel, the less I have to be in it. NO talking about it doesn’t make the hurt or the sadness or even the anger go away, but what it does is, makes it less powerful over me! The more you shed light on it, the less the hurt can survive – because it’s out there and known, and no longer in the dark place of quietness, walls, weight or shame!
It has taken me a long time to get here …. but I am really seeing such a huge difference when I go into therapy and just open up and let my therapist know right away whats going on inside and how healing that feels vs me holding it alone and feeling disconnected.
My therapist Andy is amazing and I am so blessed that he has really shown me what healing looks like in the light vs the dark! He has truly helped me to see and feel the difference.